Modern self-esteem is not well received by the world. One unfavourable piece of criticism at work or one snarky comment on an Instagram image is all it takes to ruin your day.
How can we stop others from flying a knee in the face of our magnificence after spending so much time and effort convincing ourselves that we are awesome?
And how do we apply it to improve?
In this article, we’ll explain how to tolerate other people’s opinions without wanting to run away or punch someone.
1. Don’t take it to heart
Unfortunately, it is simpler to say than to do. However, the sooner you can move on with your day and appreciate the positive aspects of the world, the sooner you will learn to shrug off negative comments.
On the subject of not taking things personally, Frederik Imbo spoke at TED. He lets himself go and becomes sensitive to the hurt of criticism. He has endured a great deal of unfavourable criticism as a referee and has developed the following coping mechanisms:
Not about me, really.
Create a foundation for what you already know to be true about yourself so that you can spot unfounded criticism.
Be sympathetic to yourself and understand that when you are hurt by anything, you might not be able to shake off criticism right away.
2. Laugh at it
Use some comedy to deflect criticism that is being directed at you personally. Sofia Vergara excels at doing this. She frequently receives teasing in interviews, much like many famous people do. She uses the phrase “whatever” frequently and in an overdone manner.
In a Jay Leno interview, Leno makes fun of Vergara for putting on weight while on vacation. Despite the awkward chat, she continues to respond with “whatever” in order to ignore the remarks and make the crowd laugh.
3. Pep-talk yourself
Science has proven that negativity does effect you, despite your best efforts to deny it. Recognize any snarky remarks or unjustified criticism and replace them with something constructive.
Researchers have discovered that when people receive 5.6 positive comments for every negative comment, they produce their greatest work. Give yourself a pep talk when you’re the target of harmful criticism. Keep a phone note that you fill with positive aspects of yourself.
Try to find at least three positive traits about yourself in each of the following categories. Afterward, take out your note and read through the things you wish to say about yourself in that area whenever someone says something negative.
4. Avoid destructively critical people
It’s sometimes best to avoid spending too much time with pessimistic folks. Your energy can be unnecessarily expended by destructive criticism.
You might not be possible to completely ignore a critical person, depending on the relationship. However, there are instances when you can put yourself at a healthy distance from them.
Perhaps a coworker that you work with is unfavourably critical of the way you carry out your duties. Ask your boss if you can collaborate with others more closely. Bring it up. Even if you can’t completely remove the individual from your life, brainstorm ways to minimize the amount of time you spend around them.
5. Respond With Grace
Never give a response to destructive criticism. Remove your hands from that negativity by swiftly clicking “delete” on abusive emails that are of no use to anyone. The same is true with face-to-face conversations.
But when you’re ready, you should properly respond to constructive criticism. After expressing gratitude for the other person’s perspective, you should gently state your agreement or disagreement while taking the time to explain your position if required.
Use the ability you have to transform these criticisms into instructive experiences or discussion starters!
When receiving criticism, it is important to be grounded in your identity. That way, when destructive criticism comes your way, you’ll know it doesn’t define you. And when you receive constructive criticism, you’ll be able to recognize it and make necessary changes.
