Dating is a wicked game.
You meet people, you hangout with them, for lack of a better word, judge them and decide whether this is someone you would want to be a huge part of your life or not.
It is a big decision after all, sometimes even life altering, hence it is very important that the person you choose to invest your time and energy in is someone who is worth it and is willing to do the same for you.
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Here are a few signs you need to look out for in your partner if you do not want to be with a narcissist.
1. Self Absorbed and Entitled
Have you noticed that the majority of the conversations that you have are about them; especially how good or great they are?
Well, that isn’t bad on its own, but when it becomes always about them and never about you, I guess it is your sign to reconsider this bond.
A narcissist has a big ego and feels as if they are entitled to the best treatment from everyone else, regardless of how they treat others.
2. Trying to One-up Everyone
A trait in narcissistic people is trying to one-up everyone; both in good as well as in bad.
“Oh, you drive a Hyundai? I drive a Beemer.”
“You have a 3-bedroom apartment? Well, I have a 4.”
“Oh, you have diabetes? Well, I have cancer.”
This trait is often because of their desire to have all the attention on them. And this type of attitude is not healthy for a relationship.
3. Lack Of Empathy
Empathy refers to the ability of a person to feel someone else’s pain or suffering.
A person with a narcissistic personality often lacks empathy, fails to understand others or fails to show remorse.
This is one of the most toxic things that could be a part of a relationship as it leads to lack of understanding, communication and leads to eventual heartbreak and suffering.
If the person you are seeing displays a lack of empathy towards others, it might be your sign to flee while you still can.
4. A Lack Of Friends
Narcissism doesn’t only destroy romantic relationships, but also friendships.
Nobody likes being around a narcissist. In every social bond, each person wants to be heard, acknowledged and respected, but is very hard for a narcissist to consider anyone beyond himself/herself.
As a result of which, even the friends start maintaining a distance from them. If your partner tells you about their lack of friends and how people keep leaving them, chances are that they are the problem somewhere, not the friends.
5. They Gaslight You
Gaslighting someone means to emotionally manipulate or abuse someone in a way that makes the abused feel like they did something wrong and deserve to be treated this way.
This includes lying, accusing someone of things they don’t do, guilt tripping, spinning the facts to create a somewhat different narrative and try to distort the reality of the situation.
All of this, just to win the argument. This is the most toxic, and however, most common form of abuse in relationships. Some of the common things a person who gaslights their partner are:
Some of the common things a person who gaslights their partner are:
- You're No Longer What You Used to Be
- You're Overracting
- Why Can't You Be More Like Her/Him?
- I Think You Need Help
- You Always Have to Be Right. Don't You?
Narcissists often gaslight their partners to gain a sense of superiority and power in the argument. And if your partner does this to you, then you have some serious bad news.
There are plenty of people in the world, and when you try to be the best version of yourself, you deserve someone who is striving to be their best as well.
You do not have to settle for anyone who isn’t right for you. Take your time, and watch out for these signs in a person the next time you date anyone.